If You Mess Up, Fess Up!

Work stress, burnouts, report time… These all can accumulate to a massive eruption of emotions among fellow teachers that will make a teenage tantrum look like a trip look like a fairy-tale. Whether someone’s behaviour is only a petty annoyance or deliberately sabotages your efforts and well-kept aura, it can make life at work a complete and total nightmare! How you handle these outbursts and conflicts will depend on a number on things, including how you as an individual deal with naturally annoying and difficult people, your flexibility and sense of humour (which we all know will be at failure status the further we move along in the year), and the options you believe you have within the specific test of patience.

Unfortunately, people’s personalities and clash of the heavyweights in the staffroom is beyond your control, but there are some things you can do to at least minimise these types of problems at work.

Is it really any of your business? Take a minute to consider

Choose your battles and the mountain you want to die on wisely! Think carefully if you really need to be involved in a tiff. If you work with others, there will always be someone who will work differently than you and there will always be a wise-crack who thinks they know better. It’s inevitable. If you find differences irritating at times, your involvement is not called for, unless these differences keep you from doing what you get paid to do.

Don’t take it personally!

Objectivity is not a characteristic any of us really have when we are angry and ready to pop a vein. People are naggers and moaners, it will be much easier for your sanity to imagine that most oversights come from forgetfulness, indifference, narcissism, or lack of competence. Try and assume when someone comes guns blazing and rulers flying that it is not deliberate, even when it is… You don’t need to rationalise mean and hurtful behaviour and you can respond in the same ways regardless of the other person’s intent.

Think ahead

Prevention is better than cure. If you can anticipate your own needs in any situation, the better prepared you will be to prevent problems that may arise. Make sure you know your strengths and weaknesses and don’t step into that old bear trap when someone starts saying things to push your buttons. You know how you react to certain things, try and do exactly the opposite and call in your army if need be.

Learn to ask for what you want

When something is up, be direct. People tend to dance around a problem like a fat kid around a salad! One of the most important skills in human interactions is to ask directly what you want and address a problem head-on. Instead we see a lot of complaining, manipulating, triangulation and passive-aggressive behaviour, any of which adds a huge chunk of bad vibes to a difficult situation!

Watch your own issues

Stop judging yourself against other people’s standards or reactions! We are all approval-seekers one way or the other. Learning to hear, respect and operate from our own internal sixth sense, vision or priorities promises a great deal of freedom! Believe in yourself and always stand for what you believe in. Never just agree for the sake of agreeing out of fear for rejection or falling in the popularity polls.

Why try to fit in when you are meant to stand out? Conflict is unavoidable and it will always be part of any job, especially when it comes to teaching. Breathe, think and do not fret about the things you cannot change!